I went to a couple stores today with my fiance. I always hold on tight to his arm but sometimes when I am feeling brave I tell him that I will walk alone with no support. I know that these trips have been getting easier. Yes I always need to be with someone but I have been doing it. So why is it that I started getting bad anxiety this morning and it is lasting into the evening? Well part because we went to stores and part because it is back to work tomorrow. Sundays are the worst days for me. I know that it is the start of the work week and I know that means countless hours within my cubicle walls thinking about my problems. I try not to, but sometimes it is so quiet in the department you can hear a pin drop and those are the times that my mind can wander easily. I also worry about how I will feel all week. Will I feel as though I will pass out? Will I feel stressed? Will I be tired? Will I be more hungry than normal? I have always been a worrier. Always. When I was child I worried. I have a parent that is a worrier. I worry about everything. I worry about being late in the morning and I haven't even gone to bed yet the night before. I worry about what time I'll eat lunch or if I'll be dizzy that day. I worry that someone I love will leave the house and never come home. I worry that I
am wasting my life away when I have lazy days. I worry about my retirement. I worry about how I will react when my dog passes away. I worry about how often we'll be able to stop on a trip. I worry about everything. I also make up catastrophic situations in my mind and then everyone ends up coming home in one piece and it was all just this craziness that I created. So you can see why I have anxiety. Although my worrying never turned into anxiety attacks until I was struck with Labyrinthitis. And so I wonder, is every Sunday going to bring me a day of anxiety? Will every week be the same? I certainly hope not. Anxiety and all I tried the twisty slide at the playground on our walk by today. Not exactly the best idea but I thought I'd challenge myself. I'm not sure that is the sort of challenge I'm going for. All I ended up with was a queasy stomach and a dizzy head.
am wasting my life away when I have lazy days. I worry about my retirement. I worry about how I will react when my dog passes away. I worry about how often we'll be able to stop on a trip. I worry about everything. I also make up catastrophic situations in my mind and then everyone ends up coming home in one piece and it was all just this craziness that I created. So you can see why I have anxiety. Although my worrying never turned into anxiety attacks until I was struck with Labyrinthitis. And so I wonder, is every Sunday going to bring me a day of anxiety? Will every week be the same? I certainly hope not. Anxiety and all I tried the twisty slide at the playground on our walk by today. Not exactly the best idea but I thought I'd challenge myself. I'm not sure that is the sort of challenge I'm going for. All I ended up with was a queasy stomach and a dizzy head.

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